Disgusting Lyric of the Day 22: Father Figure by George Michael

“ Just for one moment, to be warm and naked at my side. Sometimes I think that you'll never understand me. But something tells me together, we'd be happy. I will be your father figure,” George Michael, Father Figure

This song starts off with a tone that is dripping in intense sexuality. It’s almost as if Sade and Prince had a baby and that baby is going straight for the button fly on your 501 jeans. But much like George Michael in a public bathroom, when it gets to the actual sex part, it’s not especially well thought out, kind of disgusting and could have been done with a lot less embarrassment to all parties concerned.

I don’t want to be judgmental here, but I am pretty sure that a lady who is looking for a father figure in a sex partner might not be the most mentally stable person of all time. My father gave me five dollars a week to mow the yard, take out the trash and whatever the hell else he needed me to do. Occasionally, he beat the shit out of me and he also signed my report cards. One thing we never were, though, was warm or naked together. Hell, I can’t (or won’t) even imagine my mother being warm or naked with my father. The only way this song could get more creepy is if George Michael’s offered to be your “Uncle Bad Touch figure.”